What do I love about this picture--other than my adorable dog with the smile? I love the way I look. I love my hair--I mean look at that hair! It's long, thick, and healthy. And my smile--straight teeth and never wore braces or a retainer! However, when my eyes travel downward, it's more difficult (oh hell, it's really, really difficult) to give myself compliments--but, for this blog and for the new optimistic boost for myself that I'm working on, I'm going to try (I literally had to rewrite this part like 4 times--this is HARD for me!). I do look pretty good--for a 40-year-old chick that is!
So here's the truth: I have recently gained some weight. I've gained 8 pounds over the last 2 years. While that may not seem a lot to some, on my short 5'3' frame, it's appears to be more like 20... I am not happy about it... There's nothing worse than trying on a pair of jeans and having to wiggle my way into them. I hate this friggin' muffin top bullshit and having to "hide" it with oversized shirts or sweaters. And the hiding thing is such a mind game--I mean everyone knows it's there, including myself. But my brain's hoping that if I ignore the ring around my waist, then maybe others will too--yeah, right.
Which brings me to my next point: My husband and I are on a mission, dammit. We're on this mission to change some things about our physical shape. Well, a lot of things if I'm going to be honest here. For me, it's my jiggly ass and my protruding belly--not to mention my hopes that with better shape, my boobs will miraculously rise back into shape. My poor boobs... I'm not even going to go there today... Anyway, we want to start feeling better about ourselves. So to accomplish this, we've been hitting the gym early in the morning. Really early in the morning. We rise at 4am and get there around 4:20am. We're also going 5-6 times per week--and working our asses off! With Wednesday morning being our day off--and if we happen to skip out on Friday, we make up for it with a double workout on Saturday (like we had to do yesterday)... I'm excited! I'm beginning to feel really good again. My muscles are aching, and I'm loving it! We're going to do this!
This summer, at the end of June, we'll be heading to San Diego, CA--and I plan on looking great in my summer clothes (especially the dreaded swimming suit which, right now, sucks the life out of me)! Right now I'm on my workout high--and believe me, I know what it's like to be a few weeks in and wanting to just stay the hell in my bed. I'm determined to make this time different. I'm taking a deep breath here, knowing the bazillion times I've tried and quit before, and with my fingers crossed and my eyes looking above, I'm giving it another go! Wish me luck!
P.S. The dieting part is not so rosy sunshine... Did I mention having a Peanut Buster Parfait today? Oops. What can I say--it was damn good...
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